He Can Do It, I Can Help!



My four-year-old has a speech delay.  Anyone who know us, knows this.  Jack’s speech can’t be hidden, partially because for an unintelligible kid, he sure talks a lot.  But as soon as he starts talking, people realize they can’t understand him.  So of course, they look to me to translate.  I usually can, and do, but there are times when even I (with my Mommy superpowers) can’t understand him.  Those are the times that break my heart.

So lately, I’ve been working really hard on doing speech development activities at home.  He is in speech therapy, but once a week for 30 minutes is a drop in the barrel, so I find myself working harder and harder at designing games we can play together.  My cousin, a speech language pathologist, mentioned that he may have trouble with phonological awareness.  So I’ve been educating myself on what exactly that means. 

In that research, I came across this little snippet:

Acquiring phonemic awareness is important because it is the foundation for spelling and word recognition skills. Phonemic awareness is one of the best predictors of how well children will learn to read during the first two years of school instruction.

--Reading Rockets

I read that and immediately felt freaked out that Jack will always struggle with words, sounds, and by extension, reading.  I took off my glasses, closed my eyes and rubbed my fingers over the bridge of my nose.  I took a deep breath and told myself that even if he does struggle to read, it’s okay.  It doesn’t make him stupid or slow.  It just means he has challenges.  And I feel equipped to help him meet those challenges.

And then, suddenly, I felt thankful that I’ve been given this awesome kid who forces me to raise my game as a parent.  Sure, I could wish for everything to be easy, but that’s not Jack.  And he is going to help me learn so much about the world and myself.  Is that corny?  Maybe, but it feels a lot better to embrace him as a whole child rather than constantly trying to address speech as a separate problem.  It’s not a problem…he’s not defective…he just has to work harder than a lot of other people to reach the same goal. 

Hopefully that’s a lesson he brings into the future with him.  After all, there’s nothing wrong with a little hard work, right?

And while I know all that is true, and I know he’ll speak properly someday, when I start reading articles that begin with “Does your child have a speech delay?” I nearly start crying.  Every.Time.  Even though I know the answer and have known it for nearly 3 years.  I still want to cry every time I start at the beginning of new reading materials on how to approach a speech delay.

I think it’s why I often skip right over the beginning stuff and plow into the “what to do about it” materials.  If I can DO things, I don’t have to feel helpless.  And lately, I want to DO everything I see that applies to speech therapy.

If you think your child might have a speech or other developmental delay that may require intervention, you can call Birth to Three yourself...you don't need a doctor's recommendation.  And if your child is over the age of 3, talk to his or her doctor.  Follow your gut...Mama's instincts are almost always right!